Guest Blogger Julia McDermott: Je ne veux pas break le rule...

Dialogue, and those pesky pronoms relatifs!

Dialogue is my favorite part of fiction.

I love to write it, and I love to read it. I love it when (my) characters talk. It accomplishes the “show, don't tell” rule – which we writers must obey – nicely. It also moves the story along and is a good time for conflict to arise. It can be serious, funny, embarrassing, comforting, sincere, deceptive, despairing, upbeat, or –  pretty much anything. 

My novel MAKE THAT DEUX is written in the “first person” point of view, and the main character, Jenny Miles, even talks to herself (not out loud, normalement) – she often uses “internal dialogue” to reflect about life, the French, men, etc. During her year in France, she talks to her boyfriend back in the States on the telephone only a few times, since it’s very expensive. But he also “speaks” to her regularly through handwritten letters mailed across the Atlantic.

Meanwhile, Jenny talks to her roommates and other friends – usually in English – while doing her best at school and elsewhere to learn to speak fluent French. She's been studying the language for years, and she can understand it most of the time - la plupart du temps. Which is fortunate, since all of her college classes are taught en français, complete with “blue book” written exams and the occasional oral exam thrown in.

Fast forward to the present, and my love of dialogue. Récemment, my French (conversation) class, taught by Madame Marie-Hélène, has been reviewing relative pronouns. You know: those necessary words that we don't think about, but that we use all the time (and that make our dialogue flow more easily): who, that, which, what, whose, whoever, whom, whomever, of which, whichever, where and when. 

Most of which are necessary in dialogue.

Voici des pronoms relatifs en français, which I’ve been trying to use often enough to say

without thinking: qui (who, which, that), que (whom, which, that, what), dont (whose, of whom, of which), and où (where, when). For some reason, dont is my favorite; it seems simple, but it's really not, and it doesn’t sound anything like “don’t.”

Some other relative pronouns are used just with certain verbs, and are somewhat trickier (I’ll let you guess the translations): auquel, auquelle, auxquels, and auxquelles. Yet others are used only in certain cases: avec qui, en qui, chez qui, près de qui, à côté de qui; ce que, ce qui; sur/sans/dans/chez lequel (or laquelle); and, of course, simply à laquelle.

You can imagine how many times Jenny, her boyfriend, her roommates and friends use (English) relative pronouns during dialogue scenes. If they didn't, it wouldn't be naturel. However, they often omit the word “that,” which is okay to do in English; it’s not okay to do en français. But when they talk to each other, we get to know them through their conversations, just like we get to know our friends…friends with whom we speak, using whichever words we prefer, where and when we meet, doing what we want to do, together.   

The point is: An author must know the rules 

before breaking them... no matter what language!

www.makethatjulie.wordpress.com

facebook.com/JuliaC.mcdermott

Twitter @MakeThatJulie

MAKE THAT DEUX (click to go to Amazon)

Three American college girls living in an apartment on theMediterranean. Two boyfriends back home. "The One" (and only), ifit's "meant to be" -- whatever that means!  Jenny Miles has three goals: to speak French like a native, to travel all overEurope, and to have a blast. Meanwhile, two men compete for her attention andamour, ici et là. C'est compliqué! Take 10 months. Add 2 (surprise)transatlantic flights, 2 Greek isles, 1 moped (une mobylette) and beaucoup delettres! Subtract 1 phone, 1 promise to be faithful, and 1 bikini top. Lasolution?  Make that...a year that Jenny will never forget.

Guest Blogger Autumn Birt: Putting the Social Back in Social Networking

 Putting the Social Back in Social Networking

It is not about the numbers. If what drives your marketing campaign is reaching 1000 Likes on Facebook, 5k followers on Twitter, or simply selling 10,000 books, well there are businesses that claim they will get you that. Give them your money and it will happen. When it does, get back to me and let me know how you feel. I’m guessing it won’t be everything you dreamed.

I won’t say marketing doesn’t have anything to do with numbers. Quantitative results are easy to digest. They are driven into us at a young age so that reaching a goal is equated with hitting a number, normally a large number. I understand that.

But would you rather have 100 followers who ignore everything you say or 10 that retweet, talk to you, and may actually read or have read your book? That is an easy answer for me. But then, I would define myself as a qualitative person.

If my goal was simply monetary, I’d probably be at a casino instead of writing. I wonder what the stats are on that: the chance of winning at a gambling table versus making it to the bestsellers list with one book out? My bet is on the chips and not the keyboard!

If you listen to the well established Indie authors you will hear them say that the chance of immediate success is about nil. It takes time to build a following, it takes multiple books, and it takes consistency in quality and originality. The rest is pure luck.

That is about as comforting as hearing the best way to lose weight is to reduce how much you eat and exercise, but they are both hard truths. Swallow it down and get over it.

Then take note that those same established authors are out there beating the marketing pavement and feel that cold seed grow in your gut. The marketing never ends!

Okay, go get a good dose of alcohol to drown that realization in and then we’ll continue.

The interesting thing about the perpetual marketing required of Indie authors is that it means there are well established authors you can watch and learn from. Isn’t imitation the best form of flattery?

Another nifty thing about marketing is that since there is no sure-fire way to get to the top (other than be good, work hard, produce lots of great novels, and find a way to tell everyone without turning them off) is that the potential for you to discover something that works really well is always possible. That smart mouthed shout out on Twitter might just net you a 1000 followers. The person who looks over your shoulder as you scribble plot notes between meetings might be your next big break. In marketing at least, the playing field is pretty level, especially for the inventive. It is also constantly changing. No set strategy will remain productive. Shout the same thing every day and people will tune you out. It is like nagging. I’m really good at ignoring nagging. A good marketing strategy should constantly evolve (this may explain the no tried and true path to success). Hey, at least you won’t get bored with it.

So this has become the slogan of my marketing campaign: quality over quantity. I do set milestones for myself. The next 10 or 50 new followers, reaching 500 will be great! But these just give me a small carrot to run for (and a reason to celebrate. I really like to celebrate). I’m also pacing myself for a marathon of marketing for the rest of my life (after that someone else can take over barring the zombie apocalypse. In that case I’ll keep running the marketing campaign).

The real core of my marketing though is something else entirely. I’m trying to be the best follower that I can. Really. Isn’t it awesome when someone retweets or likes a post? Better yet, comments? Oooh, or reads your book, loves it, and tells the world in multiple ways? I love those people. I love them so much I’m trying to be one. Good karma will come back around and at the very least, it gives me something else to talk about. No one wants to hear a writer talk about their work 24/7. People tend to avoid those sorts of people. Not a good marketing strategy.

So, if you see me online, say hi. Or I might just say hi. If you need something, let me know. I’ll see if I can help or if I know someone who can. I want every Indie author to hone their skills and write awesome books that set souls (especially the writer’s) on fire. Isn’t that what it is really all about?

Follow Autumn on Twitter  @Weifarer or check out her website and check out her books on AMAZON

Guest Blogger Cathy Ace: The Chicken and the Egg...

Two Firsts = an egg and a ????

My thanks to Jill Edmondson for inviting me to write this, my first ever “guest blog”—one First. Yesterday I gained a spot on my first ever “Bestseller List”—another First.

Two Firsts in two days. It makes me think of chickens and eggs. 

The week my publisher offered me the contract for my first novel, THE CORPSE WITH THE SILVER TONGUE, I bought myself a memento: a one-foot-tall plaster egg with French windows cut into it, flung wide to reveal a chicken inside, peeking out. Quite surreal, and referencing the unanswerable question: “Which came first?” 

I know that traditional publishing, i.e. having a printed book published by a recognized publisher, is not the route every writer wants to take. Personally, I self-published two volumes (one of short stories, one of novellas) in order to help find a traditional publisher. For me, it worked: TouchWood Editions read the Cait Morgan Mysteries I’d written in my first two volumes, liked them, and asked if I could produce a full-length novel showcasing Cait’s character. THE CORPSE WITH THE SILVER TONGUE was well reviewed by The Globe and Mail, Publishers’ Weekly and Library Journal—three highly influential sources covering Canada and the USA. I was, of course, delighted. That was in the spring of 2012.

In the spring of 2013 my second novel, THE CORPSE WITH THE GOLDEN NOSE, was published. Again it’s been very well reviewed (how can being likened to “Christie or Marsh, with a bouquet of Kinsey Millhone” in the Globe and Mail, March 2013, be bad?) and, yesterday, my publisher excitedly passed on the news that it had appeared on the list of the Top Ten Bestselling Adult Books in BC. In fact, it was the only work of fiction listed! They were delighted, as was I. And, again, I returned to the age-old question about chickens and eggs.

During the past year I have learned something very important: neither the chickens nor the eggs will survive if there isn’t a farmer tending to them all the time, so I’ve become the farmer.  I’ve

Facebooked, Tweeted, reviewed on GoodReads, Liked, Shared, Commented, typed countless smiley faces, and winkey ones. I’ve found groups of people online, who, like me, enjoy traditional mysteries without strong language, sex or gratuitous violence. I’ve grown to feel a true sense of camaraderie with people I’ve never met, and probably won’t. We share photos of our dogs, other people’s cats, agree about the importance of coffee, reading, and staying positive in the face of challenges, big and small. They’ve graciously commented upon my news, and I’ve been inspired and, sometimes, saddened, by news of their lives. It’s been a revelation. I am not alone! Who knew? 

There’s also been another revelation: I’m not just the creator of the chicken, or the egg (depending on which you think comes first) I also have to be the farmer. It’s not enough to write a book. It’s not enough to find a publisher. It’s not enough to polish your original work with a team of professionals who’ll midwife it into the world with you. You have to hang in there, tend to it, guide it toward people who can enjoy it. No, I’m not complaining about this aspect of living the life of an author—I know there are many who’d kill (!) for the chance to have this work facing them every morning. I delight in it. It’s become an important part of my life. I know how very fortunate I am.

So: chicken or egg? If the egg is the author, the chicken is the character. If the egg is the character, the chicken is the manuscript…you get the idea, I’m sure. Manuscript/finished book. Finished book/ reviews. Reviews/sales. Sales/happy readers. Happy readers/the Bestseller List. And, if the egg is the Bestseller List for BC, then the chicken is…..? 

I have no idea. 

Sorry. I didn’t mean to let you down there, but it’s inevitable. As I said, it’s an unanswerable question. I know…if the original egg is the author—me—then I should refer you to my Mum. She

must be to blame for it all!

You can find out about Cathy Ace’s traditional mysteries at www.cathyace.com.

You can keep up to date with Cathy Ace at her author’s Facebook Page: Cathy Ace – Author, or you can follow her on Twitter: @AceCathy

 Cathy's books and bio on AMAZON




Update May 29th, 2015: Cathy and I finally met for the first time last night at the Bony Blithe Awards Dinner!  Here's the evidence:

New Words: Nominalizations

Language grow and morphs and changes, over both time and place.  And then of course, slang gives language a kick or a boost, depending on your point of view. New words are added to English via science and technology and as a result of globalization. And then there are words that evolve - either with a new use or a new meaning - as a result of being cute, or as part of industry jargon, or because of advertisers.

A recent piece in the New York Times talked about verbs being recast as nouns. 

Take the word "ride" for example.  It's a verb, an action word.  Over time, "ride" has morphed into a noun.  Example: "Dave has a new car.  It's a really cool ride.  His new ride cost $30K.  He took me for a ride in his new ride." 


And then there's "read" - and all you fellow writers and bookworms out there are certainly familiar with it.  Example: "Have you read the new Stephen King novel?  It's a great read.  This read was so compelling that I read it all night!"  

Just think for a minute about a website familiar to many of you:  GoodReads.   The site isn't called GoodBooks or GoodNovels, but GoodReads. 

I both love and hate nominalizations of verbs.  The more annoying examples are in cases where a perfectly suitable noun already exists.  The word "reveal" is a case in point.  

Example: "At the end of the show, the magician will reveal his secrets!  Don't miss out on the reveal!"

In the above case, why not use the word "revelation"?

As a writer, I'm happy to add new words to my toolbox, and I'm all in favour of taking artistic license.  It also goes without saying that I enjoy seeing language being used creatively.  However, in my opinion, many instances of verbs as nouns are a tad lazy or a tad sloppy.  If you reach - really reach - for the right word, it's probably out there.  But if it's not, then go ahead and use an invent!


Read the NY Times piece that inspired today's blog post:  http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/03/30/those-irritating-verbs-as-nouns/

Worst Book Titles Ever

This is a random sampling of bad book titles, selected from myriad sites with their own

lists of bad book titles.  Some are kids' books, some fiction, some are nonfiction, and some of the nonfiction titles should be fiction!

The Big Book of Lesbian Horse Stories -Ride baby, ride!


The Practical Pyromaniac - Hope this includes the phone number for a good criminal lawyer.

Foreskin's Lament - What is there to say here?

What's Your Poo Telling You? - No this has nothing to do with the cuddly bear.


Dumb Old Casey is a Fat Tree -  I have no idea what a Fat Tree is.


The Haunted Vagina - Don't even start...


I Knocked Up Satan's Daughter - For all I know, this is a hilarious book... 


The Beginner's Guide to Sex in the Afterlife - Is there an Intermediate or Advanced guide? 

I Was Tortured by the Pygmy Love Queen - Maybe the characters from this one should get together with Satan's Daughter...

Zombie Bums from Uranus - Too easy.  Facile.

How Green were the Nazis - Um...

Satan Burger - I can't even begin to imagine what the plot might be about.

Sodomy and the Pirate Tradition - Is the title slightly redundant?

Old Tractors and the Men Who Love Them  - Gawd, I really hope "tractors" is a euphemism.

What Buttosaur Is That? - There's got to be a mother-in-law joke here...

Fancy Coffins to Make Yourself -Would you get a do-over if you screwed up?