I'm Bored... So...

You may have noticed that I haven't done very much blogging in the last little while, and perhaps you're wondering why that is.  The short answer is that I'm bored.

I'm not exactly bored with stories and ideas, but I do feel a bit of ennui with some of what comes as part and parcel of writing: being sedentary, being solitary, being silent.

Don't get me wrong: I do have several works-in-progress, and I will indeed finish them sooner or later, but for now I need a break.  The break isn't just from writing, but also from the auxiliary tasks that writers must attend to, such as tweeting, promoting, etc.  In short, I've been spending  too much time chained to my desk/smartphone.

So, what I plan to do over the next while is try a whole bunch of stuff/do a number of things that are new to me, or that are different from my usual routines and milieux.  

A few years ago, when I was going through some big changes in my life, I decided to try something new.  I took Fencing lessons, Belly Dancing classes, and I did several courses in Improvisation.  I had a lot of fun doing them all, but what I particularly liked was waking up a different part of my brain, tapping into different talents and skills (or lack thereof.)  I may do them all again someday, or not - who knows?  And maybe some of the things I try out over this summer will eventually work their way into the next Sasha Jackson Mystery, or will provide inspiration for a short story.  

* Apropos the above: Two weeks ago, I broke my foot and sprained my ankle, so methinks Fencing is not in the cards for the time being. 

Guest Post by Lisa De Nikolits

Me and My Nasty Characters  

Guest post by Lisa De Nikolits

“Tell me, did you purposely try to come up with the nastiest, most unlikeable characters ever, or did that just happen naturally?”

I had no idea how to reply, so I just stared at the woman who had asked the question.  

The woman had recently finished reading The Witchdoctor’s Bones and when we met up at a reading, she followed me to the far side of the room and, with my back against the wall, she wanted answers.

I tried to figure out whether she was wondering if the nasty bits emanated from my own personality, in which case she probably thought I should be on a therapist’s couch instead of standing there chatting to her.

But mostly I was wondering which characters she was referring to, and why she had found them to be as obnoxious as she did; I mean sure, there were some evil people in the book, that’s why it was a psychological thriller, a murder mystery, but even the bad guys had one or two redemptive qualities that created some empathy between them and the reader but perhaps this was an erroneous assumption on my part.

I tried to recall what some early reviewers had said of the characters:

“…they do remind you of characters you've encountered in a late-night screening of Moulin Rouge. You know, the kinds of people you don't naturally gravitate toward but whom you're unable to ignore. You're drawn in. Illicit love, rejected love, misfired love, machinations of all sorts, and all involving characters of dubious integrity and (in some cases) of questionable sanity.” – Doug O’Neill, Canadian Living Magazine.

Rob Brunet (Stinking Rich) called the characters “seemingly normal,” with the book “a lusty dusty romp, with excursions to the nastier regions of human desire.”

Liz Bugg (Calli Barnow Series) called the characters intriguing and Terri Favro (The Proxy Bride) dubbed them sometimes twisted, but none of the reviewers appeared to find the characters as deeply nasty as the reader who had me pinned with my back to the wall, a reader who clearly wanted some explanation.

“Morality,” I finally offered and she looked even more confused. “My books are all very different, right?”

She nodded.

“And if you’re looking for any common denominator among them, it’s this; they all explore human morality. I like to take people and put them into unusual situations and then see what unfolds. It’s like a pressure test, see who breaks first, and how they break, and what the consequences might be. And do I try to create nasty characters? No, I don’t. In fact, I don’t see them as nasty at all but fully human. The truth is, a lot of people out there are absolutely heinous, much worse, in fact than most of the ones written about, because if we were to write about them, they would seem beyond the range of reality. Characters always need to be believable, and sometimes, what people do in real life isn’t believable at all. If you were to write it down, it would seem too far-fetched.”

The reader looked doubtful.

“I agree that some of the characters in The Witchdoctor’s Bones are pretty nasty,” I conceded. “Take Stepfan for example…”

“No! I really liked him!”

Again I was incredulous. “But he’s a selfish, chauvinistic, misogynistic, arrogant, vain and rude man. How could you like him?”

“He didn’t know he was all those things. He didn’t know that nobody liked him. He was just being himself.”

“I see.” I wasn’t really sure what to say next. “Well, I’m glad that the book resonated with you, that makes me really happy.”

The reader eyed me warily and again, I wondered if she thought that the author of such a book needed long-term counseling on a therapist’s couch.

Fortunately I saw a friend arrive and I ducked under the reader’s arm and made a hasty escape.

“Chatting to a fan?” my friend asked and I laughed.

“Um, I don’t think so.”

For more on Lisa and her books, check out:  http://www.lisadenikolitswriter.com/

and follow her on Twitter @LisaDeNikolits

Someone Has To Die by guest author Autumn Birt

Today, I have guest author Autumn Birt and she discusses killing off characters. It's not as easy as you might think....

Someone Has to Die

There is a war. Brave heroes face countless obstacles, horrible foes, and great odds. Yet, somehow, everyone walks out with a handful of scratches. What the heck?!

I admit it, I hate it when my favorite character dies. I’ve put down novels when too many characters that I’ve come to care about are killed off. But there is something too sappy sweet, too fantastical, when no one dies. Bad things happen during battles. People get hurt. Someone will perish.

And I don’t just mean secondary or tertiary characters. I mean the ones that kept you reading the novel. Only minor injuries after insane quests used to be a pet peeve when I was a reader. When I began writing my epic fantasy series, the Rise of the Fifth Order, I realized I had to live up to the expectations I had when I merely read fantasy. I was going to have to kill someone off.

I think my first reaction was “!?!???!”

After I stopped hyperventilating, I started wondering who?

I’m writing book 3 of an epic fantasy series. I love all of my characters, even the ‘bad’ ones! The thought of losing one of them after having shared (created) their hopes and plans for the future… well, it gives me a new perspective on why some authors never have a character die. But that isn’t the type of story I wanted to write… or the one I was writing. As the chapter numbers kept rising on the final book in the series, I knew I had to make a choice.

How does an author choose which character dies?

The situation could dictate it. Maybe only one or two characters are in extreme danger? For me, that didn’t apply. There is a war, everyone is facing danger. Any one of them could make a simple mistake, fall into a trap, or be in the wrong place. I was actually going to have to make a choice. At some point… I kept stalling.

Then I realized, if I couldn’t choose and any of the characters were just as likely to die, there was another possible solution: a random Yes/No generator!

Talk about a way to come up with a plot twist?! It removes the emotion from the decision, allowing the author to step back and simply see what fate offers. I wrote down names, hit a random generator button I found online a few times and wrote down the results. End of story.

Not entirely. Oddly, the results matched what I’d already been thinking. I think it may have been rigged. And the problem was, it felt like a cop-out. I wasn’t pushing the story to the depth, emotionally, that it could go. But I needed to keep writing if I was ever going to finish, so I went with it.

In the end, the moment, and character, offered itself. And it wasn’t the one from the random yes/no generator. It was someone I hadn’t written down, probably because I would never have considered letting them die, much less planning their death since book 1! It fit the story in ways I had never seen and explained actions at the end that I knew would happen but hadn’t known why. I was good with it. It felt right. Even if it hurt. A lot.

And that really is the bottom line: Not letting anyone die can subvert the impact of a novel as much as choosing the wrong person.

I’ve already begun the outline of my next WIP, which will be a darker fantasy than the one I’m

finishing. More people are going to die. I hope that the story unfolds similarly to Spirit of Life, the final book in my epic fantasy series, and choosing won’t be an issue. If it is, I haven’t given up on the random generator idea! Actually, after recent posts at the Guild of Dreams on the lack of disabilities and mental illness in fantasy, I’m thinking I need some gaming dice or at least number assignments for levels of injury. There is more to battle than life and death. Short term injuries, long term disabilities, death of friends or family, mental impacts, all of these things are relevant in life and our writing. I want to be a brave enough author not to shy away.

What about you? As a reader, what do you think when a character dies, or doesn’t? As an author, do you have problems killing someone off or is planned from day one (and does that make friends hesitate accepting dinner invitations?!)?

__

Do you want to help make Spirit of Life, book 3 in my epic fantasy series, happen? I’m running a Pubslush campaign and would love your support. What, you’ve never heard of Pubslush?! Follow the link and check it, and my campaign, out. I’d love to hear what you think!

Links (if the above are broken)

Pubslush: http://SpiritofLife.pubslush.com

Disabilities: https://fantasycollective.wordpress.com/2014/02/22/the-challenging-and-the-challenged/

Mental illness: https://fantasycollective.wordpress.com/2014/01/30/even-the-strong/

Autumn's page on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Autumn-M.-Birt/e/B007B2AFCS/ref=ntt_dp_epwbk_0

Autumn's blog: http://www.nomapnomad.com/ww/contact-me/

Follow Autumn on Twitter @Weifarer

Who Are You Inviting?

I'm not sure if other writers feel this way, but for me, when it comes to writing, I need to have a solid idea of who my characters are before I start.  I may not have every tiny detail worked out, but I have a good idea of their general personality traits, their flaws, their strengths.

I liken this to hosting a dinner party.  Long before I plan the menu or select the vino, I think about who to invite.  Which guests will mix well with the others?  What common bonds might they share?  I may think to myself that I surely have to invite Tyler - he's always good for jokes and injecting humour into an evening. And of course, I have to invite Jim - he always has wild stories to tell.  Julie just got back from a trip to Brazil and I can't wait to hear about the trip.  Donna will probably bring her guitar and after dinner drinks may turn into a sing-along.  And I know that if I invite both Liz and Andrew, there will likely be a heated debate about politics or current events since they are polar opposites.  

You get the idea.  

Once I know who I'm dealing with, the plot slowly starts to come together.  If I know Andrew is a bit of a hothead, then it will be easy for me to thrust him into situations and know just how he will react.  And when it comes to dialogue and Tyler - piece of cake because I know he will crack wise at any opportunity.

There are all sorts of charts and lists that one can create (or find online) to help you with character development, but I don't use any of those.  I'm fairly loose about backgrounds - what I do for one I may not do for another.  But generally, for most of my main characters, I'll figure out:

• political leanings - and do they usually vote?
• zodiac sign
• education (major), or did they drop out of high school?
• religion - whatever it may be - do they practice it actively?
• where they fit in the family tree (middle child, youngest, etc.)
• relationship with parents (and were they divorced?)
• ethnic/cultural background
• attitude towards some "hot button" issues, like marijuana, immigration, gay marriage, etc.
• talents/hobbies that have nothing to do with the plot or with their jobs (do they play an instrument or are they on a sports team?)

The list could go on and on (do they prefer Coke over Pepsi, Apple or Windows, are they afraid of heights, do they have/do they like pets, do they have any allergies, etc.) but the above points usually give me an idea of who my character is.  And that's a great start!

Excerpt from Something Wicked by Renee Harrell

Something Wicked

by Renee Harrell

SYNOPSIS:  

Reeling from a nasty break-up, Ann Lippens isn’t ready for a new relationship, even with someone as attractive as Cody Rhodes. When she rejects Cody's advances, the musician turns his attention to Ann's best friend, Kim.

Kim couldn't be happier. Cody is charming and mysterious, talented and sexy as hell. Who wouldn’t want to be at his side?

Within days, Kim is changing her appearance and behavior to please her new boyfriend. Ann soon discovers that Cody is the near-twin of a dead rock star named Bobby Winters. Winters had a dark and troubled history until his fiery demise. Bobby's string of girlfriends all died early, suspicious deaths.

Discovering the secret timetable for Kim's murder, Ann realizes she's the only one who can stop it. But it's not Kim who Cody truly wants....

RENEE SAYS: 

When my partner, Harrell, and I finished writing the first draft of our story, I felt something was missing. We’d written a novel with a high school-aged protagonist – Ann Lippens is our take on a less secure, more body-conscious, Nancy Drew – but the tale had taken an edgy turn. We needed an opening that offered a hint at the darkness to come.

A few days later, we’d plotted the story’s prologue. We know a lot of readers can’t stand prologues (or epilogues) and routinely skip over them. I certainly hope they read this one…

EXCERPT:

Far below them, the sea splashed against a row of jagged rocks. The ocean roared up at her.

"Isn't this beautiful?" he said. 

The warmth of his breath tickled the tiny hairs on the back of her neck. She turned to see him smiling.

For the first time in days, he appeared relaxed and happy.

"Yes. Yes, so beautiful!” Here at the cliff's edge, with the blue sea beneath her, everything seemed fresher, brighter. Her spirits lifted.

He asked her a question, his words snatched away by the sound of the ocean.

"What?" she shouted.

Irritated, he started to speak before changing his mind. He swept his arm out, his hand extended.

She reached out to him. When she did, he gathered her in his embrace. Pressing a hand on the small of her back, he began to sway.

He wants to dance, she thought.

He'd danced with her before but only once, the night they'd met. Now, he moved smoothly along the cliff's dirt surface. She matched his steps, content to follow his expert guidance.

It was romantic in a weird kind of way. Not a typical date, not by a long shot. After all, how many girls could say they’d slow-danced on Kraken's Peak?

She would remember this afternoon for the rest of her life.

He murmured as they danced. She strained to make out his words. A moment later, she realized there weren’t any words to be heard.

He was humming.

She recognized the tune. She didn’t like the song – Not that I’m going to tell him – but it was his favorite. He'd played it for her, more than once.

With a flourish, he ended the dance. He bowed to her.

As he straightened, she hugged him tightly. "This is perfect," she said into his ear.

"No." He studied her, from her red hair to the green patchwork jumper that brushed lightly against her hips. “Not yet.”

He yanked the heart-shaped locket from her neck. Staggering as the chain ripped through her hair and over her head, she caught herself at the very edge of the cliff. Beneath her shoes, tiny stones spilled into the void, tumbling into space.

She tried to step forward. He put a hand out to stop her, scorn in his eyes.

"Bye," he mouthed, his open hand shoving against her chest.

Flailing her arms desperately, her feet slid on the loose soil. She tried to regain her balance, grasping blindly for anything to stop her descent.

Screaming, she dropped over the edge of the cliff.

He watched as she fell. Her cry was lost in the thunder of the waves as they smashed into the rocks below.

"Things weren't perfect." He wrapped the chain of the locket around his fist. "Things couldn't be perfect because you weren't perfect. You could never replace the woman I loved.

“I have to get her back.”

FIND OUT MORE:  

"Renée Harrell" is the semi-pseudonym of Renée and Harrell Turner, a wife-and-husband writing team. Although we primarily write YA fiction, we've dabbled in science fiction (Aly's Luck and After Things Went Bad), teleplays (Bill Shakespeare's Next Big Mistake) and humorous mystery (Frankenstein, P.I.).

Check out their website HERE and find their books on AMAZON.

BETA READERS! BETA READERS! SIS, BOOM, YAY! By guest author Gloria Ferris

           After my front-line editor has scrutinized my manuscript and we’ve wrestled to the ground every punctuation and grammar error, and repaired every lapse in plot flow we can find, I print copies for my beta readers. They are my last line of defence, my last chance for perfection, before the submission letter. I know perfection is impossible, but I still strive for it.

                The really important thing about beta readers is that they love to find errors. And I love it when they do. I am profusely and genuinely grateful when they pass me their well-thought-out comments. I do the happy dance when they find anything amiss, whether it’s in timing, grammar, or punctuation. When one of them triumphantly informs me that a character stood up twice on the same page without sitting down in between, I could cry with joy. I mean, how would a mistake like that look to a publisher? Amateur time, right?

                Often, a beta reader will come back to me with a question like, “Why did Lyris get hit in the eye with a snowball in Chapter 2, but there’s no mention in the rest of the book of the eye turning black?” See, this is a good question. Not a deal-breaker maybe, but easy enough for me to go back and hit Lyris in the stomach where it won’t show, or drop in a mention of her black eye in a subsequent scene. Beta readers help ensure every little sub-plot is tied up in a pretty bow. Paying customers may not notice the bow, but they might be thrown off by the omission of a black eye.

                I have one reader with a highly-developed sense of justice. She thinks every character should get their just desserts. They should pay for every transgression. Um, no. Nobody gets away with murder in my books, but plenty of minor offences go unpunished. Knowing her as I do, I overlook the social order critiques and celebrate her gift for locating double words, missing words, missing punctuation — in short, she takes my manuscript closer to perfection.

                If more than one beta reader makes the same, or similar, comment, I pay attention. At this late stage of the writing process, I’m not keen on making any major changes to plot line or character development. But, if something is bugging several beta readers, then it will bug a lot of paying customers. Thankfully, though, this doesn’t often happen.

                I would never send out a manuscript without first filtering it through my beta readers. When I give them the printout — much better for finding discrepancies than electronic reading — I ask them to get back to me within three weeks. To encourage them to be honest with their opinions and make it easier to list their findings, I also hand them a pre-printed form. Not one of them has failed me yet.

                Where do you find beta readers? They are everywhere, and mine include relatives and friends. A few are also writers. I acknowledge them by name and thank them in my books.

                I know writers who don’t use beta readers at all, and some who only ask other writers to read their manuscripts. Whatever works, there’s no wrong way to do it. But, my little posse of beta-readers works well for me! 

 

A former technical writer, Gloria’s first mystery, CHEAT THE HANGMAN, won the 2012 Bony Blithe Award for best light mystery. She is working on another mystery novel and occasionally writes a short story or novella just for the heck of it.

www.gloriaferris.com

www.gloriaferrismysteries.blogspot.com

www.facebook.com/gloriaferris

Follow Gloria on Twitter @GloriaFerris

Excerpt from The Forgotten Gemstone by Kit Daven

The Forgotten Gemstone 

By Kit Daven

Synopsis:  True nature is impossible to forget. Ule is Xiinisi, a race of trans-dimensional world builders. Shunned by her peers and spurned by a love interest, she retreats into one of her creations, a model 24-60-60 planet remembered for being joyful. There, she discovers an ancient friend has died, the inhabitants of the world have forgotten her, and lush groves have eroded into desolate desert. Dismayed by the ill turn in the world's evolution, she decides to return to her realm only to find the path blocked. In her search for a way home, Ule discovers a darkness has settled into the world. Bisi Nomads, a man-hating tribe who roam the desert as a form of sanctuary, force her to flee into the desert where she encounters Istok, a cactus demon determined to spread his brand of fear. Bound by his magic, she becomes wracked with pain until she is pulled into a dream state. Upon awaking, she is thrust into a world which has changed yet again. Merchants and farmers struggle to rebuild after a one hundred year war and even worse... Ule cannot remember who or what she is. Surrounded by folk who encourage her to forget through hard work, food, alcohol and sex, she looks inward for clues to her identity. There, she begins to understand and nurture who and what she has always been. In her debut novel, Kit Daven combines a childhood passion for rock collecting with her ongoing fascination with demons and mysticism to create a blend of fantasy, science fiction, and some elements of horror, which explores the importance of recognizing and honoring core identity.

Kit Says:  The passage I selected is the beginning of Chapter 21.  This passage marks the beginning of two closely linked scenes that were very challenging to write. While preparing the third draft of the novel, the story called out for an additional scene or two to illustrate the final moments of a hundred year war. There was a lot to keep track of by this point: continuity details, the development of two characters (The Smith and Adinav) and the introduction of a new character (Kaleel, a cat demon), the expansion of a setting, diagrams of the fighting choreography, and further development of the Xiinisi universe in general. Once I began writing from all these notes, the words came slowly. The process was a little escruciating at first, but then something shifted in my mind, and although I was writing a little slower, ideas and words came together in such a way which gave me chills. Whenever I read these passages now, I get a thrill, not because of the gore and the fighting and the demons, but because I discovered I am the kind of writer who can work well from extensive notes and outlines while staying true to my vision and voice as a storyteller.

Excerpt:

Brain oozed from a gash on the dead soldier’s forehead. Blistered forearms and a bloated stomach indicated the middle-aged man had been dead nearly a week. Putrefying flesh slid over bone as he lunged between toppled benches.

Swiveling sharply, a blacksmith curtailed the point of the corpse’s long sword. Weighed down by shield plates and a bulky leather apron, his thick arms and chest glistened. With skill he parried with the corpse and when the space between them had widened enough, he sank his sword into a spot just below the solar plexus.

The corpse slumped forward onto its knees. The blade twisted easily in the buttery entrails. With a soft slurp, the smith withdrew his blade, severing a tendril of energy which controlled the undead man. For a moment, the body hung there. With a groan, the magic released its hold, and the corpse crumpled onto the white marble floor.

Sweat dripped down the smith’s scarred face. He wiped his square jaw. Stubble prickled his cheeks and neck except for the end of his chin, where a thin braided beard fell to his chest. He tucked the end of it back inside the apron and adjusted a red leather skull cap over his bald head, grateful for the strange writing and the lens in the brow which showed him what others couldn’t see—filaments of light connected to the dead.

A tall lanky creature strode toward him wielding a lowered saber and spoke. “This bodes well, my friend.” Bright almond-shaped blue eyes scanned the slop of carnage in the throne room.

The smith caught his breath, reared himself up to a looming height yet still found himself a couple feet shorter than his unexpected ally.

“I’m not your friend,” he said. With sword slightly raised, he backed off, examined the room for any more possible threats then focused on his new companion.

Feline features slightly distorted a lean, human figure. Pale, slightly wrinkled flesh covered its body. Unlike others of its kind, this demon wore clothes: brown leather trousers, a belt fashioned from small bones, and a sheath slung across his shoulder.

“Adinav’s army is nearly finished,” announced the demon. He wrinkled his nose in disgust. “Soon there’ll be nothing but bone to resurrect.” He motioned to the corpses. “Why else might he raise the dead again?”

“To exhaust his enemies,” the smith suggested.

“Perhaps.” Bemused, the demon turned about to face the throne, flinging the blade of his saber over his shoulder and letting it rest there. “A century of sucking dry nearly every resource in the world, all for what? To channel magic. And all this time I thought Adinav a pig and vain to want to rule the world. To tap demon magic? Some other goal drives him, but what?”

Still cautious, the smith wondered too. Getting close to the Grand Magnes had been difficult. And for the last decade, the ruler had locked himself away in the heart of the castle, surrounded by his closest confidantes and inner court noblemen.

“You’re Kaleel right?” The smith lowered his sword. “The one who’s been freeing demons from Adinav’s control. How is it he hasn’t manipulated you?”

The creature flashed a smile that deeply curled the tips of his thin lips and elongated a rounded maw protruding from a human shaped head. “I have a certain charm.”

For more on Kit Daven, check out her WEBSITE or order her book from AMAZON or follow her on Twitter @KitDaven

Excerpt from Tripping Prince Charming by Ey Wade

Tripping Prince Charming

By Ey Wade

The Author Says:  

This excerpt from the romantic play/dramady, Tripping Prince Charming caused me as much drama and trepidation as it did the character Nathaniel .  His love for his lady fair was eluding him. She, Lillie-Rose McIntyre, has endured a very violent marriage and along with her girlfriends,  decided they would be in charge of the path of their love story. Tripping Prince Charming, a fairytale on its own, is written in acts and scenes and tell the tale of three very entertaining,  sweet love stories.

Nathaniel is a man determined to hold the woman from his dreams, in his heart like a precious pearl clasped in his hand. This is a tidbit of his anguish.  


Excerpt:

Nathaniel leaned back on the porch swing of the Gardiner home until his head was resting on the wrought iron frame and he closed his eyes. The metal was as uncomfortable to his flesh as his thoughts were to his mind. Sighing deeply, he searched his heart to try and figure out exactly what he need to do about Lillie-Rose.

 In his heart there was nothing but love for the woman. He knew without a doubt she was the one he wanted to spend the remainder of his life with. The problem was, Lillie-Rose was scared to death. The mere mention of the word marriage and she practically ran away mentally and physically. Not that he blamed her. After living through a violent and abusive marriage at a young age, and an equally violent childhood, he could understand her running in terror. Though he was doing his best to court her slowly with small gifts, attending quiet dinners in her huge hideout of a home, sometimes engaging in extremely sensual make-out sessions, full blown overnight lovemaking and patiently listening to her voiced fears, he was afraid to initiate a conversation that could possibly take their relationship to the final level or kill it where it stood.


To know more about Ey Wade and her books, visit 
http://wade-inpublishing.com 
Grab excerpts and pins http://bit.ly/TPCpins
BLOG: http://trippingprincecharming.blogspot.com
TWITTER: @jumpouttheboat 

Humor in the Sasha Books

Even with dead bodies turning up here and there, crime fiction, especially hard-boiled private eye novels, often - in fact should - have a dose of humour in it. 

Here are a few examples of humour in the Sasha Jackson Mysteries:

The understatement:  “I can fuck up a bowl of cereal.”  (Frisky Business)  My protagonist Sasha Jackson is (like me) a terrible cook.  More than one person has told me that they laughed at this line.  I guess it’s that it’s just so simple, so benign, that visualizing what one would have to do in order to fuck up a bowl of cereal makes it funny. 

Repetition:  In Dead Light District, I re-use a play on the great Caesar quote: Veni Vidi Vici.  I variously write Venti Vidi Vici or Veni Vidi Visa or Veni VD Vici.

Adjectives: Have some fun with these!  Take invented words to the next level by inventing  adjectives via hyphenation.  In Blood and Groom, Sasha works part time at a phone sex line (and hates it).  Here’s a clip from one of her calls:  “Some heavy panting in my ear brought me back to reality. The horny schmuck on the phone was on the brink of physical gratification and needed dirty talk from me to guide him through it. Twenty more minutes to go. I trotted out everything I’d learned about performing and guided Sweaty-Hairy-Trekkie to telecomm-tele-cum.”  And a line I like even more is this one from The Lies Have It, which takes place during a municipal election in Toronto.  “Fortunately, there were almost no election signs for the three-hundred-pound, donut-snarfing, sub-literate, right-wing troglodyte – the only candidate whose victory would make me want to self-immolate in front of a library.”  (Torontonians may clue in to my inspiration for that one...)

And then there’s internal monologue:  This passage is from Frisky Business, and I think it’s initially funny because it’s based on a misunderstanding, but it’s also funny because of Sasha’s thoughts on it as it happens.  PI Sasha Jackson walks into a porno studio as part of her investigation, and the guy she talks to assumes she is one of the actresses:

“Go on through,” he said to me, “change room’s on the left.”

“Excuse me?  I’m not an, um, actress,” I replied.

Dude checked me out from head to toe.  “Wanna audition?  Nice face, and people love blonds.  You a natural?”

“Yes...”

“Good.  It’s better when the carpet matches the drapes.”

In my mind, I punched him in the nose.

“I’ve never heard it put—”

“Looks like you got a good body, even though your tits are kinda small for film.”

Excuse me?

“I thought the camera added ten pounds?” I said.

“Not where you need it, babe,” he said.

What?

Enough.

“I’m an investigator,” I said, handing him my card. “Sasha Jackson.  And you are...?”

“You’re a what?  Who the fuck said that you could come in here?  Get out, this is a private studio.”

He pushed the door open and waved me through it.  I stayed still. 

“Look, I just need to talk to you for a second.  I’m not trying to cause any trouble.”  He raised an eyebrow at me.  “I just need some help, from you, or maybe some of the actors, maybe the blond over there.” I made like I was about to walk over to her.

“All right, all right.  Let’s go out front.”

I followed him back out through the swinging doors.

“What’s your name?” I asked him again.

“I’m Bongo.”

Of course you are…

Finally, there is situational humour:  You can take situational humour to another level – a wee bit over the top, as I did in the first three Sasha JacksonMysteries.  Essentially, inversion is what is at play here:  My sleuth does the right thing but the wrong way.   I can’t say much more than that because of spoilers, but picture a topless blond running down the street of an upscale neighbourhood with a large sauce pan on her head.  Or imagine a lacy pink bra making the front page of the newspapers because said bra was a key piece of evidence in a crime...  The bra and saucepan incidents themselves are funny, but what gives even more of a laugh is that the action is so out of context and so distant from the thrust of the story, which is solving a crime. 

Interview with Joyce Strand

Today, I'd like to share the interview I did with Joyce Strand on her blog Strand's Simply Tips.  

Joyce asked some great questions!  

Have a look at her blog HERE.  

A Quick Look at Indie VS Trad Publishing

I have a guest piece up now at Tobin Elliott's Blog.  In it, I discuss some of the advantages and disadvantages of Indie VS Traditional Publishing. 

I consider various points such as release dates, creative control and distribution. 

Read the whole article HERE. 

Fiction Dreams Guest Blog

I am happy to say that Suzy Turner of the Fiction Dreams Blog recently invited me to be a guest.  I shared with her a character profile of PI Sasha Jackson.  For readers who haven't met Sasha yet, you'll find out a bit about what I think makes her real, makes her easy to relate to.  I mean, really, hasn't everyone been shot in the boobs, or been involved in a buck naked catfight?

Read the whole post HERE.

And follow Suzy on Twitter  @suzy_turner