Friday, October 23, 2009

A little more about Victor and his Dating Profile

I haven't said much about Victor yet...

To know him is to love him, sort of. Victor is a very nice, very rich DWEEB! He's a nerd, a dork, a geek... There is no nicer way to put it. He's socially awkward, always says the wrong thing at the wrong time, but he's harmless, and he means well, it's just that he's so... argh!

Victor was one of Sasha's first clients, and since she wrapped up his case a while back, he has developed a crush on Sasha... lucky her, not!

So, Sasha is doing her best to try to help him find the love of his life, or at least a date - anything to get him out of her hair. He had his eye on one woman and Sasha gave Victor advice about how to try to sweep the woman off her feet. One thing Sasha suggested was a box of truffles, but Victor thought Sasha meant truffles the mushrooms, not the chocolates. Needless to say, that didn't work.

So now it's time for Victor to try online dating. Here is Victor's profile/personal ad:

Are you the Girl for me?????

Looking for a long term, committed relationship with someone who shares my hobbies. I enjoy stamp collecting, rock polishing, reading old maps and calculating baseball statistics.

I am a successful, self-employed male, 5'5", 192 lbs. I am clean shaven, have brown eyes (I wear bi-focal, horn-rimmed glasses with tape on them), brown hair (I'm kind of going bald but no one notices because I comb over the bald spot).

I enjoy going out for a nice romantic dinner at an all you can eat buffet, and I like polka dancing. I also like a quiet evening at home - drinking a glass of warm milk and listening to my Ethel Merman collection.

My favourite colour is plaid, my favourite flavour is vanilla, my favourite book is Roget's Thesaurus, and I have a pet goldfish named Goldy.

Drop me a line if you think we're a match!!!


  1. Jill when your book comes out, might it be possible for me to review it?
    Or, if it's out already I'd like to do so.

  2. Sure Rebecca! That would be great.

    My book will be out next month. Please email me at and tell me the postal address where I can send a copy of Blood and Groom.

    Cheers and thank you, Jill

  3. *chuckle* Love the truffle part- very cute!

    When I was little I often thought a truffle pig would be cool- who wouldn't want a pig that could sniff out chocolates?

  4. Sounds very interesting, I hope your book is a success...

  5. OMG! I'm sure Victor sat in the back row in Grade Four throwing spitballs at the girls to show his affection.

  6. Wow. Poor guy. That dating profile seriously made me want to run in the opposite direction.

    Hilarious! :)