Dating Post #1 - Ick Ick Ick

Ick Ick Ick Ick Ick Ick Ick Ick Ick Ick Ick Ick 



People often ask me about inspirations for my characters. Ha!  The answer is Real Life!  I swear to gawd, I have a magnet in the middle of my forehead that draws freaks and weirdos to me.  I seem to meet a great number of them via the dating world. So, I'll be doing a few posts in the coming weeks about dating in general, but for now, let me begin with El Jerko Supremo.   



I had one date with Super-Doofus, and it was so bad it almost made me want to give up on dating all together.  

Dickhead and I arranged to meet at a restaurant.  He had arrived a little early and was already seated at a table when I got there (that detail will be important a little while from now...)

Dude is middle aged.  He told me that for his "midlife crisis" he decided to get some tattoos.  He got his first tattoo a few months ago.  Now, I am not against tattoos, and any adult who wants one, should go ahead and get one.  But...

On Mr. Moron's forearm was a tattoo, a German quotation, comprising a few lines of text.  Did I mention it was in German? Yes, German.  Dingbat does not speak German.  But he still got a tattoo in German. 


Loosely translated, the tattoo said: "I have no God, I have no master. I am my own master, I am my own destiny."  Something like that.  But in German.  I have no comment on the content of the tattoo, or the "philosophy" of it.  (Nietzsche anyone???) 

The tattoo had the German pronoun "I" four times.  The German first person singular pronoun in the subjective case is "Ich".  The pronunciation is exactly the sound a cat makes when hacking up a hairball.   Remember: There were four instances of the 1st person singular pronoun on his arm.  Four. 

A sloppy pronunciation of "Ich" might sound like "ick" (rhymes with "sick" or "dick" or "prick".)

Well, Mr. Dumb Dumb - who apparently has never heard of  a German-English dictionary - had it spelled  "ick" in three of the four instances.  The fourth time, it was spelled correctly (Ich).  It's 2015 for gawd's sake... Look it up online before getting PERMANENT ink on your 
arm!  

I commented on the three misspellings and he replied: "Yeah, it's got a few typos."  Typos?  Are you kidding me?  I really wanted to stick a fork in my eye at that point.  But I politely sat through the WORST DATE EVER IN THE ENTIRE HISTORY OF DATING. 

When it was time to leave, Dorkface stood up and put on his... hoodie.  Captain Idiot told me  where he got the hoodie (in case I want to get one for myself?)  Here's the link to the site from whence he ordered a Hyena Hoodie - complete with a tail.  YES... MY DATE HAD A TAIL!   
And, yeah, Sir Loser Lose-A-Lot is about 50, and he's still single.  I wonder why?

Recent Reads: Heist Bandidos Takedown

This was off to a rip-roaring start.  I loved the first half of the book!  But then... meh...  The second half felt unrelated to the first half, and I found it rather predictable at times, and a little bit forced (plot-wise) at other times.  I generally enjoy Da Silva's books, so my lukewarm feeling about this one won't deter me from reading more by him.

WOW!!!  This was terrific!  A weirdly, wildly wonderful tale of some of the most inept would-be tough guys ever!  Edwards has a terrific voice, and he gives enough detail to make you see and feel the places and people, but not so much that it feels bogged down.  A thoroughly enjoyable book - highly recommended!!

Totally MEH.  I was a die-hard fan of Evanovich/Plum from day one, but now... The books just feel forced and silly now.  Once upon a time, Stephanie's shenanigans were a delightful romp, but the magic is gone.  I'll probably read the next installment - because, hey, there's still Morelli and Ranger - and I hope the next one harkens back to earlier books.  

Recent Reads: Great Angel Jury

It was okay, I guess.  Ferguson made some great points and I agreed with some of what he had to say.  I particularly liked his discussion of community involvement.  But... there were a number of points I disagreed with.  Overall, I guess it made me think, so that's good, but overall, I was a bit disappointed.

Hmmm... now, let's see... I read this in 2015 - about six decades after it was first published.  Had I read it way back when, I'm sure I'd have enjoyed it more.  The depictions of women, the interactions between Hammer and women, the dialogue, etc. all really grated on me.  I liked the plot and the pace, and Hammer is the ultimate Hard-boiled PI, but still, it was hard to take at times... And I figured out whodunit before I got to the end.  

This was a good read - and different from my usual tastes in crime/mystery fiction.  The plot was terrific, with lots of twists and turns.  The settings and description - the research that must have gone into this!!! - were great, very detailed.  I could see the places, and I could feel the tensions the characters experienced.    Recommended.  

Glass Blowing!!!

On Saturday, I tried glass blowing for the first time ever.  It was a bit of a challenge, but I really enjoyed doing it.  The workshop was at Harbourfront Centre in Toronto, and I was working with instructor Anne.  She's been doing glass works for many years, and she is now in her third year as a resident artist at the Centre.  

The hot, fiery furnace looking thing above is actually called a Glory Hole.  Yes, really. 
The process begins with a scoop of molten glass (from the boxy looking furnace in the right hand side of the photo).  The glass is stuck on the end of the metal rod.  

The temperature of the Glory Hole is about 2250 degrees Fahrenheit.  Holy shit that's hot!  So, you stick the rod into the Glory Hole and keep rotating it to get some shape.

Then, you dip the mushy lump of molten glass into trays with bits of coloured glass.  You then stick it back in the heat so that the added colour melts in.  The process is repeated a couple of times (as more colours are added). 

  

Then, Anne used tongs to shape the top a bit and to smooth out any stray pieceds around the neck (of the metal rod).  

Then it was time to blow, blow, blow.  The harder you blow, the bigger (and thinner) the ornament becomes.  Throughout the process, the rod must continually spin, or the glass will droop and sag (and your sphere will become a deformed oblong or some other odd shape). 

Because the glass is so darn hot, it needs a day or so to cool down, so I picked it up today (Monday).  

Voila!  

My three ornaments!  The small, turquoise one was a deliberate SNAFU - I just wanted to see how it would look without being forced into shape.  Kinda cool...

Ed and Aurora - two other instructors/resident artists - stood at the ready to add the stem (so the ornament can be hung on a Xmas tree).  It's juts done with more molten glass and a pair of pliers to twist it into shape.  

Pate de Verre

After burying myself in school for the last several weeks, I finally got busy doing something new and different, and very cool: Pate de Verre.  I had no idea what this was all about when I stumbled upon the website for Nanopod Studio and saw their list of upcoming workshops.  

But since it wasn't terribly expensive and was just an afternoon, I figured: What the heck - might as well give it a try...  

The instructor was Tosca Teran y Hidalgo, and she was amazingly patient.  I think I asked her 627 questions (many of which were duplicates!)   

The inside of the mold is "painted" before you do anything else.  The paint is not what you'd expect.  It's very finely-powdered, coloured glass to which you add some kind of magic solution to bind it enough so that it will hold in place.  Once you have the outer (or bottom) layer painted, then you fill the mold with little bits of ground glass - the pieces are so small and so fine that they looks like grains of sugar.  

Next, the masterpiece is kilned for several hours.  The temperature of the kiln is fairly low (comparatively speaking), which is why the glass granules retails their shape, as opposed to melting together. 

Here's a short YouTube video that gives a brief explanation of what Pate de Verre is and how it's done.  

*  *  * 

So, I did the first part (above) on Dec. 13, and went back tonight to pick up my finished piece.  Very cool! 

I had to use a little chisel  and a pick (it looked like a medieval dental instrument!) to gently smash away the plaster cast.  I literally broke the mold.  Anyhow, the pics tell the story and you can see my colourful skull end result.  

Did I mention that this activity was very cool?!  I had a lot of fun doing this and look forward to doing it again some day.

The five photos above were taken by Tosca Teran - the artist-instructor who owns Nanopod Studio.  Tosca is awesome - and very patient!  Her studio is filled with all sorts of her creations: jewellery, metal works, glass works, a wild pair of shoes and a very funky pink felt headpiece/wig! I can't wait to return and discover some new creations.  

I'm in good company!

It was a pleasant surprise to see Blood and Groom listed in this "tour" of Toronto mystery novels, especially since the book came out just over five years ago!   And I have to say, I'm in great company.  I've read just about all the other authors mentioned on this page (which is from the January 2015 issue of Toronto Life Magazine, on page 97).  Pretty cool that Blood and Groom is listed as one of the "ten grisliest" whodunits!  Since it was PI Sasha Jackson's first case, I'm sure she would agree.

Netflix: Misc. Documentaries 7

Very good!  Of course, in my case, they were speaking to the choir.  Lawrence and Richard put forward a pretty solid, very coherent argument.  

Kind of neat, but not exactly Earth-shattering.  Fun to see a face and say "Ooooh!!  Him!!!  I didn't know he played that character..."  

As as fan of improvisation, this was a treat.  Again, not exactly Earth-shattering, but interesting.

Recent Reads: Loss Great Crush

Hated this one!  Just awful, solipsistic, not the least bit funny, self-indulgent... an utter waste of time.

OMG!!!  I had forgotten how beautifully written this book is!  Not a single throwaway sentence, every single word belonged on the page!  And the story - wow!  I had forgotten so many details in the 30 years since I last read it.  Wow - jaw dropping!

I love the idea of Dorsey's books - his tone and humour grab me, but as I've said before: He carries on the joke just a wee bit too long.  

Netflix: Misc. Documentaries 6

Loved it!  I already knew the gist of the story, but I knew little about the band and its growth/changes over the years.  I did see them in concert a couple of years ago (with Arnel singing) and it was fantastic.  I've long been a fan, so of course I thoroughly enjoyed this!

Great idea, poorly executed.  It would have made a huge difference if he'd taken it on more as an exploration in investigative journalism and added analysis of sorts to it.  I wish he'd explored the ad world writ large, maybe peeked at effects of advertising, growth of consumerism, etc.  As it was, the movie felt like it had no point.  Too bad.

Interesting albeit not exactly gripping.  Cool to learn a bit about the biz and the folks behind the scenes.

Oh no... Netflix series #3

Eye candy... delicious eye candy (and by that I mean the clothes in general, but Auggie shirtless in particular).  There's something very slick about this show.  And Eyal is pretty hot too.  Love all the locations (and the Toronto bits!)  Did I mention Auggie shirtless?  

I like the supporting cast/minor storylines much more than I like the lead actor/main storyline.  I'll check out future episodes just to see what happens to the Christian chick and her hubby.  Clayne Crawford, Abigail Spencer and Adelaide Clemens are the strongest characters in the series IMHO.  

This series really just tries too hard.  It's okay if there's nothing else on, but...  Stilted dialogue, plots have to many holes.  Can be fun at times, but overall it's meh.

Love it love it love it!  Terrific cast, terrific characters!  Powered though one season after the other.  Again, it's a lot of eye candy (whether that means the men or the fashions is irrelevant).  

Very disappointing.  Loved Simon Baker in The Mentalist.  Here he seems petulant and one dimensional... almost vapid.  Supporting cast is mostly good, especially Alan Rosenberg, but Dabney Coleman's character is irksome - cold and soulless.  Weak scripts in terms of both dialogue and plot.

Oh oh... Netflix: Series #2

Lovedlovedloved season 1!!!  Liked season 2.  I wish I could to slap Piper.  I want to see more of Alex.  The last scene of the season 2 finale was terrific!

I haven't seen the American version and don't want to.  This Australian show has some of the best script-writing in television!  Cleaver is by far one of the best TV characters ever imagined.  

Eye candy (Jim Longworth).  A fun diversion.  Wish it hadn't been cancelled at the end of season four - theyrleft viewers on a cliff!  Who shot Jim???  And what about the wedding???

Boy, can Kevin Spacy ever play a cold, heartless, calculating son of a bitch!  And Robin Wright as his wife - bee-yotch!!!  Eagerly awaiting the next season.